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Post by Senator Phillips on Jun 21, 2020 6:14:02 GMT
Smoke and mirrors and obnoxious comics all were on full display on this show, with not all happening according to plan, for better or worse.... --- TIPWF x Santana Family Wrestling: The Showdown 8:00 PM on Friday, June 29th at the Beltway Hippodrome in Washington, DC Bonus Match Anthony Kalb vs. Neil  The Chairman took a shot at ENHANCE's Neil following the main event, and the paid jobber surprisingly held his own, kicking out of two Adam Smith Drivers and landed enough offence of his own to stay in the match. Kalb, though, was undeterred and hit his inverted brainbuster lift scoop tombstone one more time to finish off his opponent, and the show. Main Event: Senatorial Office #1 Ranking Bout"Young Blood" vs. Salvador Sosa  This was supposed to be Salvador Sosa's crowning moment, the biggest match of his career. And yet, as he stood across the ring from Young Blood, something was obviously off. Young Blood was too short. Young Blood was wearing a cheap ski mask, long sleeved shirt and sweatpants. Young Blood also was wearing horrendously ugly light blue boots. And seconds after the bell, it was obvious to all that "Young Blood" was not Young Blood at all. Instead, Salvador Sosa found himself up against the insufferable Stanford Bradley. And somehow, Stanford lasted over twenty two minutes, frustrating Sosa with his usual antics, even hitting a late rana bomb, but finally falling to the Road to Salvation vertebreaker as Sosa walked away with an uncharacteristic fury in his demeanor. Felix Santana Jr. and Felix Santana III vs. Itzcoatl Hernandez and Dungeon Dominguez(Lucha POWER) with El Experto  A match was scheduled, and instead, an outright fight broke out as Lucha POWER/Warrior Pro's Dungeon Dominguez was revealed to be Hernandez's partner. Surprisingly, El Experto even got in on a wild fray, which was eventually broken up, leading to an actual match. The Santanas did well at first, but the constant interference of Experto at ringside, and a lack of positional awareness from Felix III would lead to Dominguez catching him with a crossarm camel clutch. Prove It Bout Cowboy Johnston vs. Valentina Verda with Red Masterson  Cowboy Johnston was on a mission with top rival Red Masterson appearing at ringside, to the distaste of both competitors. Johnston held nothing back, firing away with a flurry of his best moves, repeated Borderline Breakers and even the rare Red River Spiral. His victory almost seemed inevitable, when Valentina Verda managed to counter with a backslide pin to score the astounding three count as a result, gaining a future rematch with the title on the line. Cogburn Ranch(Lil' Lariato, Generalissimo Kool Q and Duke Cogburn) vs. Neon Knights(Supernaut, Holy Diver and Hija de Holy Diver)  The Cogburns were active and aggressive, but the Neon Knights are perhaps the most accomplished team in Office history, and Supernaut sent a reminder to the rest of the TIPWF when he KOed Kool Q with his Spiral Architect 630 Senton. Blue Puma Jr.(AXE) vs. Luchador Sorpresa  An excellent show of lucha libre in all its elements from Puma Jr. and Sorpresa, mixing high flying, intricate ground work, and some vicious fighting on the outside punctuated with a Puma Package Driver on the unprotected floor. As the two fought back into the ring, Sorpresa seemed to be keeping pace, only for BPJ to catch him with a counter rollup, a proper conclusion to such a match. Calista Vargas(Phoenix Rising) vs. Rodeo Angel  Rodeo Angel knew the route to victory here was at top speed, and opened the match with a Canadian Destroyer, and kept the pressure on from there. Even so, Calista Vargas nearly fought her way back into a comeback win, only for Angel to relentlessly seek the Rodeo Stretch at the end of the match, and eventually won with her signature submission. La Axolotl vs. Vice Versa  A well paced, even bout that seemed to be one of the better matches of the night, until Vice Versa took the win with a Wrangler Slam...aka, the basic scoop slam. There just might be a story behind that, considering Versa and the EWO's persistent feud with the Roland Chang Trio, who's patriarch, Chang Sr. prefers the Wrangler Slam as his own finish. Team Santana(Gorilla Power, El Froggy Mask, Moonman and Felice Santana) vs. Team Texas(Misterio Guerrero, Jimmy Jack Walker, Gunny Lee Hart and Lutadora Festiva)  A good back and forth opener with both teams showing their skills, but Gorilla Power was not to be denied, putting Lutadora Festiva down with the Gorilla Fall fireman carry sitdown bomb. --- Match of the Night: Blue Puma Jr. vs Luchador Sorpresa -Luchador Sorpresa has quietly become an impressive performer in the Office, and put on a solid match against one of AXE's best in Blue Puma Jr. In a night where few of the matches were cleanly fought and decided, this one stood out. Performer of the Night: Valentina Verda -Enduring the brunt of Cowboy Johnston's offence and catching the TIPWF Lone Star Heavyweight champ with a flash pin put the EWO's top star in the top running for the Performer of the Night role. --- Injury Report Generalissimo Kool Q: Broken Rib (Two Month Medical Suspension) -A Spiral Architect from Supernaut landed hard on the Golden Age rapper, and a post show diagnosis showed that he suffered a broken rib from the supersonic senton. Kool Q will miss several months of in ring action as a result, but keeping him from his managerial role might prove impossible in the duration. --- Directly after his match, Salvador Sosa found a camera in the backstage area, and wasted no time in addressing it. Salvador Sosa: Young Blood, you puta cabron! I go out there for a match! A match! Instead, you give me a joke! A total joke! I am so angry I can hardly speak! Face me! Face me if you are man enough! You fight Tomas, you fight Bemba, you fight JPM! You should fear nothing, nobody! But you run from me like a scared little bitch! I will fight anyone now! If you don't fight me, maybe I win the Number One without you! I will face Honda! I will face Big Banter! I will face Johnston! Anyone! Because I am a man! And because I am a man, I want to prove I am the man! Give me that chance! Or I will take it without you! Enough of this! I have more to say on the Rudo Dispatch! If you have the cajones, call up this week! I'll be waiting! --- Felix Santana Junior: So, Dungeon Dominguez was our mystery man. El Macho picked well, and yes, I know El Macho was the man who sent Dungeon to help Rudo EX. Since my father's match with El Macho, I have had mixed feelings. But my feelings are mixed no more. El Macho, I promise you, we will wrestle some day. And when we do, do not expect me to be falling for your tricks any longer. I respect your career. I regret my actions. But we must all move forward and seek our own improvement. I will do this. You have chosen to dwell only on what is wrong, and in seeking your retribution, you became exactly the thing you once stood against! I see your man in the ring, jumping me and my son with the help of the ultimate snake in the grass, Experto! And speaking of Experto...for a man who had to retire with a terrible neck injury, you were very, very active in the attack! Do not end up injured even worse than you were by Colossus, because I do not want that on my conscience! But if you keep attacking me and my family, and you keep thinking your status gives you safety, think again! --- El Experto: (Translated from Spanish) <Ah, Felix, there are so many things you think you know that just aren't as you think they are. My neck holds on my a thread, it is true. But I am not afraid of joining in the fray. Because I know that with men such as the Aztec Executioner, Itzcoatl Hernandez and the mighty Dungeon Dominguez at my side, there is close to zero danger of either you or your idiot son doing anything to cause me any harm! I, unlike you, have both the experience and the acumen to know what works, and what does not. El Macho has learned over time what works and what does not. He has my respect, and I have his. That is why I have access to talent such as Dungeon. And that is why you will always be a step behind. You and your miserable father earned one big fluke win. But you can only take a true expert by surprise one time. Now, El Macho knows what to look for. And soon, Rudo EX will finish what we started, and we will bury you. Don't tell anyone we didn't warn you. --- Cowboy Johnston: Ah gotta say, that there was one hellova match! Valentina Verda: Oh yeah it was, honeybuns! Cowboy: Yah know, ah thought ah had that match in the bag, ah was gonna show Red, there, just what was gonna happen when ah take mah shot at his infuriatin' ass! Valentina: But I showed you, didn't I, yes I did! And I showed Red out there that he can get some of that, too! Cowboy: Cain't say otherwise! An' I hope you get a chance to make a right fool outta Red some day, too! Valentina: So, you and me are going to do this one more time, aren't we? Cowboy: Yeah, we are, ain't we? Yah want mah gold around yer waist, don't ya? Valentina: You know I do! Cowboy: Way ah see it, don't think there's a better wrassler in all the Office at doin' the whole wrasslin' thing than you! An yah can dress all crazy fancy an' do all them crazy things out there, but that just hides how damn good yah are at this! But ah see it, and ah'm not gonna look past this 'un! Valentina: Aw, you're making me blush here! Cowboy: Ah've gotta be at mah very best when ah face you! Tonight proved that real good! But ah do got one real good warnin' for yah, alright! Don't be doin' any of that kissy thing out there, 'cause yah gonna make Hailey jealous...or she's just gonna be makin' fun o' me fer a long time... Valentina: Hehe, I'll make no promise there...you better watch yourself out there! Cowboy: Hah! Ah'll do just that! An' you better watch yer neck for mah big lariats! Valentina: Don't you worry, big boy, I'm too pretty to hurt! --- Supernaut: ... Holy Diver: It's Heaven and Hell! For us, we return to the heaven of winning! For them, it is the hell of losing! Hija de Holy Diver: We finally get back to the top! I'm ready for the Drifters! If we can beat Lariato, Duke and Kool Q, we can beat the Drifters for sure! Supernaut: ... Holy Diver: We have rested, but we are back now. Supernaut: ... Hija de Holy Diver: We are ready now, though! And the only real question now is; who is ready for the Neon Knights as we rise back up? --- Roland Chang III: Hey, grand dad, you got a text here on your phone. Roland Chang Senior: You know I don't go for that ridiculous typed message thing on the phone. Dispense with it and let's get going. Chang III: Um, it's from that Exotico, the masked one, Vice Versa. It just says "I used your move. Thanks." Roland Senior: Well, it is a good thing to know that the Wrangler Slam is still being used as a respectable finish these days. Tell Vice Versa that I send my congratulations in carrying on the proud tradition of the Chang family style. Roland Chang Junior: I hear you two jabbering away in here! What's this about? Roland Junior swipes the phone out of his son's hands, and the veins bulge out of his neck as he reads the message. Chang Junior: Damn piece of dumpster trash! Stealing our family finisher and using it like that should be a crime! I'd sue that bitchbastard exotico headcase if I thought it'd do any good! But what will do good, is if I go ahead and send this message back! Chang Senior: Son, you will do nothing of the sort. Chang III: Come on, dad. Chang Junior: Haha! Too late! Read this and weep! Chang Senior: The things I deal with in this family...give me my phone back. So...wait...how do I find what he sent? Chang III: Um...here it is...uh...yeah...look at this. Chang Senior: What horrendous frontier gibberish is this? Chang III: Heh, you typed "bathturd," way to go, Dad. Chang Junior: I don't care what you say, they're our natural enemies and I told them what's up! Chang Senior: There are days I consider myself to be an outright failure as a parent. This is one of those days... |
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Post by Firehawk on Jun 21, 2020 6:23:26 GMT
Elly Blackwood, speaking shortly after the show's conclusion: "So, the great Young Blood decided he didn't want to show up for work today, and sent one of the biggest losers in the world to do it for you. You want to call yourself 'number one' in the Office and yet you can't even be assed to show up for your first defense of it? The simple fact that you put THAT idiot out there in the ring to take your place... no matter your reasoning, no matter what else happened tonight, makes you one thing, Young Blood.
A coward.
You wanted to prove you were the best of the best, and to do that, you took down the best that the Office had to offer, you beat down everyone in your path in PEWA, you went on a path of destruction... and the moment you hit your goal, you stopped giving a shit.
So let me be perfectly clear. If you even attempt to pull a stupid stunt like that again, I will hunt you down myself and make DAMN sure you don't get a second chance. I know you don't give a shit about it, but you made a fucking mockery of everything any decent wrestler stands for... so right now, I want nothing more than to rip your fucking arm off, to drive your arrogant, cowardly ass through the ring, to put this stupid charade to an end, once and for all.
So make no mistake, Young Blood. I still won't seek to end your career, not deliberately. But you had better damn well believe that the world is gonna be watching. And if I happen to do exactly that... or if someone beats me to it... the world will be grateful for it." |
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Post by LankyLefty17 on Jun 23, 2020 16:24:18 GMT
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Post by Senator Phillips on Jun 25, 2020 18:30:11 GMT
Yes, this is super late, but the Office does have a card for tomorrow, with an eight person royale to determine who holds The Loop, plus GPC, Crusher Honda and much more!   Lightning Pro x Wacker Drive Revival: Thrown for a Loop8:00 PM (CT) on Friday, June 26th at the Beltway Hippodrome in Washington, DC The Loop Championship Battle Royale Jin Matsuda(ZIP Japan)(C) vs. Ross Malone vs. ??? vs. The X-Treme Kid vs. Stakhonovite Warrior vs. Fred the Red vs. Eiji "Jay" Sato vs. Astrid JohannsonAs Blue Destiny proved themselves as the unstoppable holders of The Loop, time and time again, Big Robert Montgomery decided to shake things up for the champs, and has ordered the championship to be defended in an eight person battle royale, with each of the teams in Wacker Drive picking one member to represent in this match. Of note, the Syndicate's member is a mystery, the Bebop Tiger, Eiji Sato will cross over yet again from L-Pro to represent the Blue Notes, and Astrid Johannson has been ordered by Montgomery to represent the D-Team, as the other members failed in their title shot, previously. Rumika Hashi vs. Phil MercuryTwo top contenders in their own feds, Rumika Hashi and Phil Mercury may set a land speed record in this match, neither known for letting up on the gas pedal during their matches. Hashi is currently the top contender for GP Christopher's Victorious Medal while Phil Mercury has been cited as many to be the single most popular member on the Wacker Drive roster, and could propel the Three Lions to a future title shot at The Loop with a win over Hashi. Wrecker Yamamoto with Crusher Honda vs. Ai Tanaka with Masa TokugawaTwo women seen as the "lesser" members of their otherwise dominant teams will meet here, with Wrecker Yamamoto's neck cracking power game up against Ai Tanaka's merciless striking. The Destructive Duo and Apocaylpse Now will be fully represented at ringside, with old rivals, Honda and Tokugawa in their teammate's respective corners. Miss Bauhaus vs. "Total MDK" Taylor NguyenTwo ladies with some fast growing momentum meet here, with Miss Bauhuas having earned some impressive victories as of late, including a huge win over the Syndicate's Lucretia DeCavalcante that has proven that the world famous pop star has become a legitimate threat in the ring, with a mean streak to boot. On the other hand, Taylor Ngyuen has faced a murderer's row of foes in Sakura Pro's Grand Prix lately, and while she has not pulled off any wins, her fearless spirit in defeat has been nothing short of a revelation. This could be a dark horse for the MOTN award. The Outlaw, Sam Hall vs. ???Sam Hall is never pleased with his lack of steady booking, and has demanded a spot on this show. Lightning Pro Chairman, Shima Ito has agreed to give him a match, but has refused to state who the opponent will be. Hall was said to have thrown a fit at the Beltway Full Contact Martial Arts Center offices as a result, but can at least be satisfied that he has a match. White Hot(Keiko Maeda(Phoenix Rising), Rei Hasegawa, Saburo Aoki Jr. and Yuki Okamura) vs. Yuriko Masamune, Kosuke "Choppu" Arai, Mr. Nobunaga and Koji SawadaA recurring match on prior Lightning Pro shows, with Rei Hasegawa's White Hot group going up against a team consisting of L-Pro Dojo trainers and top trainee, Koji Sawada. The pace here will be key, with White Hot looking to keep the speed up and the veterans seeking to break it down. Preliminary Main Event GP Christopher vs. Satoshi Iguchi(ZIP Japan)After having dropped a fall to the Cutter King last time around, GP Christopher has challenged the ZIP Junior Heavy standout to a singles bout in his preferred Preliminary Main Event. GPC heads into this one a day after competing against SHTCWA's CJ Fresh in Warrior Pro's G2 Tournament, but the self-proclaimed "Hardest Working Man in Pro Wrestling" doesn't seem to be concerned about the short turnaround. --- Ross Malone: All the people tell me the Action Pack is too old, we're irrelevant, we don't matter anymore. But I don't believe that, I can't believe that. Because while we might not have the best record, while we might not have the flashiest names or the biggest wins, we all know that it's not about how many times you get knocked down, it's about how many times we keep getting back up. And the way I see it, I just have to keep getting back up to win here. Lucretia DeCavalcante: Nobody is ready for what the Syndicate has to present here on Friday. Nobody. Just don't say I didn't warn you all. The X-Treme Kid: We've had it before, we'll have it again! All you losers do what you want, because when it's all over, NBNF'll have two words for you: The Loop! And then you can suck it! Stakhonovite Warrior: It is great honor to stand for my brothers and sisters for the Internationale! I fight alone in ring, but I fight with spirit of the people! And I fight with unbreakable Soviet Strength! Let me bring victory back to the Internationale! Let me bring back The Loop! Fred the Red: It's like destiny is all kickin' in right now, Liverpool is about to climb back on its rightful perch, and I'm gonna show Three Lions why I was the right man to enter this match! Champions never walk alone and we're gonna Allez Allez Allez on to victory when I grab The Loop for us! Eiji "Jay" Sato: I am honored my friend Robert picked me for this. I am not even Wacker Drive anymore, but I am always Blue Notes. And I want to do everything to make The Loop part of Blue Notes, too. Astrid Johannson: Seems so long ago when the guys lost to Blue Destiny. I sat out, but I was cheering for them! But now, it's my turn to step up and pick up the pieces! Marcus, Daunte and my Frank all did their best, but in a match like this, anything can happen, it's all about the variables and there's so many here that nobody can account for them. And maybe the one variable that they overlook the most, will be me! And if I manage to win this match, there's one thing I can't wait to do, and that's to hold up The Loop and find Sarita Jean Watkins and tell her "this is mine, now!" Because I'm just petty like that. Even thought I have a great life with my biomedical research, my lingerie football and my boyfriend, I don't think anything makes me happier right now than seeing Sarita's misery! |
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Post by Senator Phillips on Jun 26, 2020 17:27:16 GMT
A quick reminder that Lightning Pro and Wacker Drive Revival run their combined show tonight on the Senatorial Streaming Service at 8:00 PM (CT), with an eight person battle royale for The Loop in the main event. www.twitch.tv/senatorphillips |
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Post by Senator Phillips on Jun 28, 2020 15:29:32 GMT
One of the best Office shows of the year, with excellent matches from start to finish and some big surprises along the way. RESULTS Lightning Pro x Wacker Drive Revival: Thrown for a Loop 8:00 PM (CT) on Friday, June 26th at the Beltway Hippodrome in Washington, DC Bonus Match The Goodfellas(Eddie the Wire and Tony the Rod) with Lucretia DeCavalcante vs. Warrior's Crest("London Fog" Edward Joseph and Thomas Lancashire)(SWA)  As if the Syndicate's night wasn't good enough, the Goodfellas, with boss Lucretia DeCavalcante at ringside, took on the SWA's English duo of Edward Joseph and Thomas Lancashire, a team of former Warrior's Crest Pro Wrestling members. And the Goodfellas put on a classic performance, turning back the clock against their technical foes, eventually leading to Eddie the Wire putting Joseph away with his Wire Cutter for a capstone victory. The Loop Championship Battle Royale Jin Matsuda(ZIP Japan)(C) vs. Ross Malone vs. Mr. Cobra(SWA) vs. The X-Treme Kid vs. Stakhonovite Warrior vs. Fred the Red vs. Eiji "Jay" Sato vs. Astrid Johannson  There were some concerns about this royale heading into the event, without an over the top elimination option. These fears were unfounded. However, if anything was to be feared here, it was the Wacker Drive debut of the Syndicate's mystery member, none other than the SWA's infamous "Great Bishop," Fernando Rainaldo De Vincentis, or to wrestling fans: Mr. Cobra. Jin Matsuda was not going to yield Blue Destiny's hold without a fight in this match, and he and Cobra both lasted to the bitter end together. The first out was Astrid Johannson, a victim of a knockout, as was Ross Malone, shortly after. Fred the Red, inspired by his beloved Liverpool's recent Premier League championship, valiantly fought on, but was eliminated by Cobra's vicious windpipe choke. And while Matsuda did all he could, a piledriver from the Syndicate import was enough to put even a former ZIP Heavyweight champion away, earning The Loop for the Syndicate for the first time. Rumika Hashi vs. Phil Mercury  Not to be outdone by the previous match, Rumika Hashi and Phil Mercury left nothing on the table in their own meeting, each firing away at a blinding pace. Both seemed to focus on their striking game more than anything else, and while this favored Hashi earlier, it would be Mercury who would walk away with the win after hitting the Go 2 Sleep on the L-Pro #1 Contender. Wrecker Yamamoto with Crusher Honda vs. Ai Tanaka with Masa Tokugawa  Absolutely one of the best of the night, Yamamoto and Tanaka held nothing back as they fought back and forth, in and out of the ring. Both utilized the lion's share of their movesets, Wrecker constantly focusing on the neck, and Tanaka hitting her strikes, including a stunning combination of spin wheel kicks. But the one move Tanaka could not hit was the most important, her Apocalypse Combination, while it took one single Trash Compactor air raid neckbreaker from Yamamoto to close things out in the end of an exhaustively fought bout. Miss Bauhaus vs. "Total MDK" Taylor Nguyen  While Miss Bauhaus impressed with her fashion in this one, it would be Taylor Ngyuen who impressed even greater with her performance. "Total MDK" was a nonstop dynamo in this match, having shown clear signs of growth since the last Wacker Drive show, perhaps having an accelerated learning curve thanks to the Sakura Pro Grand Prix, and as a result, defeated her famous foe with a high speed combination ending in a big crossbody press. Barbed Wire Landmine Match The Outlaw, Sam Hall vs. Roland Chang Jr.  Sam Hall asked for this. Perhaps not this in particular, but the outspoken Outlaw demanded a match at any cost, and this is exactly what he received. The fans knew they were in for a trip as barbed wire boards were placed around the ring. And then, the one matchup that has been banned across the entire state of Texas, that has been explicitly cautioned against by Office management was set into place. None other than Roland Chang Jr, Hall's eternal rival and fellow rabblerouser made his entrance and the fight began. Hall was quick to bleed as Chang forced him into the barbed wire and the two traded weapon shots, whips to the wire and heavy attacks for the next seventeen minutes. And yet, when it was all said and done, the Outlaw, Sam Hall was the last man standing, after yet another DDT onto a steel chair that allowed him to earn the three count. However, the fight was far from over here... White Hot(Keiko Maeda(Phoenix Rising), Rei Hasegawa, Saburo Aoki Jr. and Yuki Okamura) vs. Yuriko Masamune, Kosuke "Choppu" Arai, Mr. Nobunaga and Koji Sawada  While White Hot controlled the pace, with Saburo Aoki Jr. and Yuki Okamura impressing with their suplexes and Keiko Maeda showing off her power, it would be the L-Pro main army that would come out ahead in this one, with Koji Sawada of all people countering Rei Hasegawa with a huracanrana to score a surprising victory right on the verge of defeat. Preliminary Main Event GP Christopher vs. Satoshi Iguchi(ZIP Japan)  To the surprise of absolutely nobody, Iguchi and Christopher put on a properly entertaining match in the opening slot, both men keeping a brisk pace. GPC's Tribute to Nagata leglock and Iguchi's trademark cutter were unable to net wins earlier in the match, but the King of the Opener demonstrated his adaptable mind with a combination resulting in a springboard splash off the corner to take the win. --- Match of the Night: Sam Hall vs. Roland Chang Jr. / Wrecker Yamamoto vs. Ai Tanaka -A rare double award, and with matches like Mercury vs. Hashi and the championship royale, it could have even been split further. As it was, Chang and Hall put on a bloody brawl that rivaled anything from the PEWA and Yamamoto and Tanaka were both at their very best in an endurance test that highlighted their different approaches. Both matches were good enough to earn this award. Performer of the Night: Mr. Cobra -There really should be no question with this one, as the Great Bishop overcame a long list of top opponents to finally end the reign of Blue Destiny in Wacker Drive. --- Injury Report Astrid Johannson: Moderate Concussion (Three Month Medical Suspension) -Dropped on her head with Eiji Sato's infamous Birdland Suplex, the same move that once injured Skullface Killah, Johannson will spend three months on the shelf to recover from such a dangerous fall. Ross Malone: Wind Knocked Out (No Medical Suspension) -The Stakhonovite Warrior's Ironhammer military press powerslam took Malone out of the fight, but thankfully, the veteran warrior will be back in action by the next Wacker Drive show, with no significant injury incurred. --- Lucretia DeCavalcante: I warned you all. Did you heed my warnings? No, I don't think you did. And now look at us. Eddie the Wire: We got The Loop. I'd call that a job well done. Tony the Rod: It's a good feeling to take care of business. The Wire: Even if we didn't do it ourselves. The Rod: It's the team that counts. Mr. Cobra: When we all believe in ourselves, when we all hold faith in the essence of our existence, that we were not made to be insignificant, but that we hold the purpose of our being in our own hands, that is when we can accomplish that which we were destined for. When I was told that my good friends here were in need of assistance, I knew that I must play the role of the Good Samaritan, and I must take leave of the SWA to come to their aid. I thank Miss DeCavalcante for facilitating my arrival, and I thank the Wire and the Rod for their support. Now, let us hold and cherish The Loop, for it is ours, and it will remain ours for as long as we see fit. And may no excess misfortune strike those who would set their avaricious eyes upon our rightful possession. For should they set their unseemly sight upon that which is ours, we shall surely see to it with our own capable hands that they will not succeed in their illbegotten designs, but will fail. And their failure shall stand as a lesson for one and all to behold for all eternity. --- Phil Mercury: The show must go on, while our Fred did not succeed tonight...the Lions will return, stronger than ever. Fred the Red: Liverpool, the champions! Liverpool is back! And the blueshite aren't champs! Not here, not in the League! That's good enough for me right now! Valerie May: Eyes on the prize, lads, the next stop, we take on the Syndicate and we get The Loop on our trophy shelf. This is what you have fought for. And if we have to take, shall I say, drastic measures...perhaps the Three Lions must become Four... Phil: Let's not worry! The Superstar Showman will lead one and all to the promised land! Fred the Red: We don't need no bloody transfers! Stay the course! Win the title! Valerie: You two utter ninnies can get bent, do you want to win? Fred/Phil: Yes. Valerie: Then we do whatever it takes! Whatever it takes! --- G.P. Christopher: Alright, that was more like it! Iguchi, you're one hellova fighter, you're the Cutter King, but I'm the King of the Openers, the Hardest Working Man in Pro Wrestling! So, let's just call this out right now! I know I'm busy making waves in the G2 over in Warrior Pro, but I have this Victorious Medal just waiting to be defended, and I have a #1 Contender needing her match! So, Rumika, let's not wait! Next Golden Touch show, let's open that thing up with a Victorious Medal challenge! How's that sound? ???: Too easy! GPC: Hey there, Crusher, Wrecker, nice seeing you back here, here in my interview space... Crusher Honda: You better beat the little Sparrow! Because if Wrecker doesn't get her chance because you blew it... Wrecker Yamamoto: We'll make you pay! GPC: Um, if you want, I'll buy you two dinner if that'll work for you, nah, but seriously, I'm cool with that. Good luck facing Ai Tanaka later, go beat her, and it'll be really easy to make Super Grey Shima make you the next stop for the GPC Express. Wrecker: I'll break her in half! Then I break you in half! And take your Medal! GPC: Lots of people think they'll do that. But I've beaten the Black Dragon, twice. I just beat CJ Fresh. I just beat Satoshi Iguchi. You're good, scary strong, scary vicious. But if you think I don't have a mean streak of my own, then you better check yourself! Crusher: Don't get cocky. We almost like you...almost. But don't think that will save you when you get in the ring! GPC: Hey, a Ronin of Destiny like me doesn't need any saving. See you two around...and don't you two get cocky! --- Kevin "The Internet" Anderson: This is World Wrestling Daily Digest's editor in chief, the best reporter in the game, Kevin Anderson here backstage with a bloody, angry Outlaw, Sam Hall. Sam, what do you have to say about that match you just had? The Outlaw, Sam Hall: You want to know what I have to say about that son of a bitch Roland Chang? I'll tell you what I have to say! I just whipped his... Out of nowhere, a clubbing blow struck Hall in the back of the head, as Roland Chang Jr. jumped out from behind the curtain in the interview room. Before Kevin Anderson could do anything, Chang grabbed him by the collar and took his microphone. Roland Chang Junior: That no good horse thieving, shit eating, girl stealing bastard! I'm givin' Hall what he deserves! And you can write that up! With that, Chang forcefully shoved Anderson back through the curtain, and bashed Sam Hall over the head with the microphone to the discordant sound of feedback reverberating through the Beltway Hippodrome. Hall lifted an arm to protect himself, but Chang slammed the microphone into his head a few more times before shouting an unintelligible curse and stepping back. A moment later, the steel structure holding up the curtain for the interview room toppled over, directly onto Sam Hall. A gaggle of security guards dashed over, but Roland Chang Jr. was far from over, and met one with a punch to the face, a second with a kick to the groin, and slammed the heads of two more together before putting the boots to the unruly mess of steel and cloth covering Sam Hall. At this point, Kevin Fitsharris made his appearance, with two more security guards, looking none too pleased with the situation. Kevin Fitsharris: Alright, seriously? Do we need to do this? Without so much as a warning, Roland Junior ceased stomping, and ran over, dropping both guards with a double clothesline, and awkwardly tackling Fitsharris to the ground. As Fitsharris tried his best to secure the crazed Texan, Sam Hall managed to make his way out of the pile of wreckage, picking up a channel lock plier along the way. Before either victim could dodge, Hall swung down and blasted both Fitsharris and Chang with the heavy tool, connecting with the small of Chang's back and with Fitsharris's shoulder. Both men rolled over in pain, and Hall again went after Chang, before scooping him up and suddenly DDTing him into the concrete floor. Sam Hall: That's what you get! That's what you get! Again picking Chang up, Hall went to drive his head into the wall, only for his foe to block the attempt, and counter with a back kick to the groin. Both men doubled over for a moment, before Roland Chang slapped Sam Hall flush in the face. Hall responded with a smack of his own, and the two then traded several punches back and forth before Hall stumbled back over a garbage can. Sam Hall rolled back up to his feet, pulling himself around a corner, with Roland Chang in hot pursuit. Chang carefully took a wide berth around the corner, and as such, was prepared well enough to dodge as a fire extinguisher came flying past his head at a startling velocity, crashing into the opposite wall with a ferocious crash. Hall continued on stumbling away as Chang followed, with the two entering into the attached Beltway Full Contact Martial Arts Center, as the cameraman filmed from a cautious distance. Picking up a 45 lbs barbell plate, Hall attempted to toss the iron object as a frisbee, but only managed to knock a large divot into the rubberized floor, as Roland Chang jumped away. Reaching back onto the storage frame, Hall then took a smaller 10 lbs plate, flinging it with reckless abandon, missing his target by a wide margin and completely smashing one of the wall mirrors on impact. Roland Chang: You damn blasted fool, you lost your everloving mind! Red with rage and with his own sweat mixed blood covering his whole upper torso, Sam Hall tried to wrench the bar off a Smith Machine, but realized too late that the bar was attached to the equipment, and received a clubbing fist to the back of his head from Roland. Firing back with a series of back elbows, Hall stunned his foe, and then, in a wild moment of desperation, jumped onto the weight bench behind him, leaping off with a diving DDT to drive Chang's face into the floor. Finding a weight clip near his hand, Hall picked the metal item up and used it to smash Chang in the face, over and over, opening a gash on his forehead. From there, Hall dragged Chang behind him, leaving a bloody streak across the floor as he pulled him out of the weight room and down another connected hallway. With a concerted effort, the Outlaw managed to lift his foe up to his feet, putting the dazed Roland Chang against an office door. A series of battering blows struck Chang in the head, and rearing back, Hall charged ahead with a leaping pump style Outlaw Kick that drove his hated enemy straight through the door...into the office of Senatorial Office Chairman, Anthony Kalb. Fortunately for both berserkers, Kalb was not present, but the effort was enough to keep Hall down, and the impact was enough to knock Chang flat out. With the two finally somewhat subdued for a moment, the beleaguered security crew and Kevin Fitsharris were finally able to catch back up, and finally separated the fray. Disheveled and more than a little irked, Kevin Anderson followed behind, and addressed Fitsharris. Kevin Anderson: This was...completely...entirely unacceptable! Kevin Fitsharris: No disagreements...none at all...those two idiots! Anderson: You better tell Anthony Kalb...tell him I'm not going to take this! I'm a journalist, not an orderly! Fitsharris: Trust me, they'll be paying a big price here...a big price for sure...and this is why they said we never book these two, isn't it? |
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Post by Senator Phillips on Jul 2, 2020 4:57:09 GMT
A double main event awaits here, with the Pan African Tag Championships and the UCSS Openweight title both on the line, on an extra large card, to boot.   Pan African Wrestling x UCSS - Butt vs. Banner8:00 PM(CT) on Friday, July 3rd at the Beltway Hippodrome in Washington, DC Main Event: UCSS Openweight Title Bout Jumbo Joseph Butt(C) vs. "Big Banter" Rory BannerThis one didn't take long to make. Surprisingly, this wasn't made at the request of Rory Banner, but rather, thanks to the champ. Jumbo Joseph Butt reportedly demanded to take his shot at Banner to answer any potential questions between the two, and to solidify his own title reign early on. Pan African Tag Championship Bout Black Star Cyclones(Layla Al-Amin and Esi Dogboe)(C) vs. Bemba's Royal Court(Yetunde Oya and Esther Musambi)The first title match of the night will see the dominant tag champs of Pan African Wrestling pitting their well-coordinated speed attack against the power and submissions of Bemba's Royal Court. The Black Star Cyclones will be looking to keep a brisk pace, while the Royal Court will be hard pressed to keep either opponent isolated long enough to do serious damage. Even so, Esther Musambi's heavy kicks and heavier power moves could leave a mark, and nobody should ever count out Yetunde Oya. Darryl Jenkins(Port City Pro) vs. Dangerous Nicholas AlgerA defacto title opportunity, with Darryl Jenkins traveling in from Port City Pro for the chance to earn a shot at the Openweight title. Dangerous Nicholas Alger, the former champ has stated that he has no interest in fighting once again for the title, and will look only to test himself in this matchup. Eliza Faulkner(CWC) and Mackenzie Bergeron vs. Red Alert(Leona Sterling(Phoenix Rising) and Aoife Daley)The trainer and trainee team of Bergeron and Faulkner will be heavily tested by Red Alert, with both Sterling and Daley having proven their mettle as a team in the past. Faulkner and Bergeron primarily focus on securing a leglock, while Sterling and Daley are known for their ability to bring the thunder with their strikes, even if they both possess more of a well rounded game than they are credited for. The Warbringer with Renate Barlowe vs. Wesley RakotoAnother speed vs. power matchup, with Wesley Rakoto's straight line agility up against the Warbringer's formidable power, but the real variable here may not be the speed factor, wtih Warbringer showing surprising fast twitch ability for his size, but stamina. Rakoto's best plan here may well be to outlast his opponent's gas tank, rather than to try to defeat him outright. Swingin' Suzie vs. ???The UCSS head referee will take a rare step back into the ring here to take on a mystery opponent, and rumors have it that this match will come with a special announcement of some sort. The Botswanan Bombers(Thunder Fist(ZIP Japan) and FENYANG) vs. Ibrahim Rahman and Anwar OmarThe return of Thunder Fist to Pan African Wrestling should be celebrated by many of the Botswanan Assassin's many fans, reuniting with fellow countryman, FENYANG in this one. The Bombers have declared their intentions to pursue the Pan African Tag Championship, but are looking to seek a tune-up match first, against the tricky, tough team of Ibrahim Rahman and the Somalian Survivor, Anwar Omar. While the Bombers are the prohibitive favorites here, Rahman can score a flash pin on anyone, and nobody puts Anwar Omar away with ease. UCSS Rules Onika Santos vs. Ong DaengsriA battle between two skilled kickers, with Santos's Capoiera up against Daengsri's Muay Thai. While Onika Santos is part of the Pan African roster, her martial arts approach should make her a natural for a UCSS style match, and Daengsri could well use the momentum a win here would build for her. Andronicus Turner vs. Oleg MakosA striker vs grappler matchup will open the show, with the refined Kronk Gym trained boxing of Andronicus Turner up against the Combat Sambo of Oleg Makos. Of note, Turner will face this match without the usual managerial aid of Rory Banner, who will be preparing for his own matchup in the main event. |
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Post by Senator Phillips on Jul 3, 2020 21:08:53 GMT
Anthony Kalb: This is your Senatorial Office Chairman, Anthony Kalb, here to remind you all that Pan African Wrestling and UCSS are presenting a double decker, super sized event tonight, with two title matches, big name guests and more of the varied, hard hitting, fast moving action that the Office fans are accustomed to. Catch it all tonight at 8:00 PM, Central Time on the Senatorial Streaming Service. www.twitch.tv/senatorphillipsKalb: Now that I got the pleasant part out of the way, I do have a few things to address from our last few events. First off, the inexcusable actions of Young Blood have gotten entirely out of hand. Skipping out on a Number One Ranking match was the last straw. But in doing so, he gave me a solution to two problems. For some time, I've been getting complaints about Young Blood's overly vulgar and crude promos. The Office has always been permissive in that area, but Young Blood has been taking advantage of our lack of restrictions for too long. Therefore, if he wants to hang out with Stanford Bradley, he can use him as his mouthpiece, too. Stanford Bradley will serve as Young Blood's spokesman, and at any point when the Number One and the PEWA Extreme champ wants to speak, he can do so through Stanford, else wise, he'll be muted on any Office broadcast. Kalb: Second, I feel the need to address the brawl that took place during last week's Lightning Pro-Wacker Drive program. After their match, Sam Hall and Roland Chang Jr. went on a mindless, bloody tear through the halls of the Beltway Hippodrome and the Full Contact Martial Arts Center, and even had the nerve to break the door to my own office. That's not going down without some punishment! First off, both of them will be fined for the damage they caused. Second of all, they each owe a public apology to Kevin Anderson of World Wrestling Daily Digest, and third, and foremost, each of them will be suspended for a month, and will be restricted from ever encountering each other on an Office show, ever again. I have had Mr. Anderson threaten to press charges for assault and battery, and spoke of a lawsuit against the Office. He has stepped down on those threats, but I do not think he was out of line in issuing them. I have had broken mirrors, a mutilated floor, blood stains and a dented weight bar in the gym, and fixing that all up will not be cheap. Let this be a warning to anyone else, if you can't keep it in the ring, at least try not to attack non-Office individuals, and maybe, keep the collateral damage to a minimum? If we're going to get violent, can we at least do so with the paying customers watching? Thank you. |
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Post by Senator Phillips on Jul 6, 2020 6:40:56 GMT
While this was not a night to thrill Dave Doolittle for the most part, it was a brisk moving evening jam packed full of surprises, knockouts, submissions and flash pins. RESULTS --- Pan African Wrestling x UCSS - Butt vs. Banner 8:00 PM(CT) on Friday, July 3rd at the Beltway Hippodrome in Washington, DC Bonus Match Juliette Erving vs. Nefertiri with Mohammad Ramses  In attendence, Juliette Erving debuted a new look and some new skills as she fought against Nefertiri, with Mohammad Ramses at ringside. While the Egyptian was no pushover, Erving's training has seemingly paid off well, as she emerged victorious following a cradle lifting facebuster, but not before going through some of her classic antics. Main Event: UCSS Openweight Title Bout Jumbo Joseph Butt(C) vs. "Big Banter" Rory Banner with Sanem Becker and Andronicus Turner  With the Big Banter Brand at ringside, and with the promise that a title victory would restore his ability to promote within UCSS, Rory Banner was extra motivated, and it showed, as Banner crushed Jumbo Joseph Butt three minutes into the first round with a series of knees from the Thai Plum, knocking out the jovial pugilist and winning the Openweight title. Pan African Tag Championship Bout Black Star Cyclones(Layla Al-Amin and Esi Dogboe)(C) vs. Bemba's Royal Court(Yetunde Oya and Esther Musambi)  Unquestionably the best match of the night, with Oya and Musambi managing to take their opponents to their absolute limit, Esther Musambi's power and Yetunde Oya's intricate submissions threatening time and time again to take the Pan African Tag Championship for the Royal Court. Musambi even managed at one point to hit Layla Al-Amin with her own sunset bomb. However, the Black Star Cyclones are nothing, if not crafty and far tougher than appreciated when the going gets rough, and Esi Dogboe managed to pull off two counter rollups near the end, the second of which was able to net the three count. Darryl Jenkins(Port City Pro) vs. Dangerous Nicholas Alger)  One of Port City's best, Darryl Jenkins arrived looking for a title shot, and seemed to be keeping pace, landing heavy punches until Dangerous Nicholas Alger turned back the clock once more in the third round, landing his signature Dangerous Kick and slapped on the Bermuda Triangle to capture an important victory. Eliza Faulkner(CWC) and Mackenzie Bergeron vs. Red Alert(Leona Sterling(Phoenix Rising) and Aoife Daley)  The fans were set for a competitive battle. Instead, they saw the evolution of Eliza Faulkner's career, and likely her biggest moment to date as she leglocked Aoife Daley only one minute and forty seconds into the match. A win as impressive as it was surprising. The Warbringer with Renate Barlowe vs. Wesley Rakoto  The Warbringer arrived wearing a full Duke University attire, and demonstrated the full range of his skills against Wesley Rakoto, keeping up with the speedy Madagascar native and putting him down with his pumphandle side slam, the Obliteration Machine. Swingin' Suzie vs. Della Dwight with "Textbook" Tim Dwight  Despite the negotiations quieting down surrounding one of the hottest free agents in pro wrestling, it appears that Della Dwight has finally made her choice, signing with UCSS. While Suzie rarely competes in UCSS at this point, she still more than held her own with the fast rising star, connecting with hard punches, and technically going hold for hold early on. However, Dwight's suplexes took their toll, and following a big short range spear, Della hit a double leg slam to earn a ten count victory in the fourth round. The Botswanan Bombers(Thunder Fist(ZIP Japan) and FENYANG) vs. Ibrahim Rahman and Anwar Omar  A hard fought match, with the Bombers controlling the pace early on, but finding themselves in trouble after Ibrahim Rahman caught FENYANG with a dragon screw, tweaking his leg. However, this only seemed to put Thunder Fist into overdrive, with the former ZIP Heavyweight champion pinning Rahman following a hard knee strike to the body. UCSS Rules Onika Santos vs. Ong Daengsri  Onika Santos was simply a step above her foe in this match, fighting in rhythm with her Capoeria style, and repeatedly diving off the top rope with double footed stomps, the last of which put the Muay Thai practitioner down for the count. Andronicus Turner vs. Oleg Makos  After a fairly even first round, Andronicus Turner absolutely leveled Oleg Makos with his signature Kronk Overhand for the knockout finish right at the start of the second. --- Match of the Night: Black Star Cyclones vs. Bemba's Royal Court -This one didn't have too much competition, on a night full of startlingly fast finishes, this match was a proper back and forth contest with the champs barely surviving in the end through their skill, will and a little luck. Performer of the Night: Rory Banner -All hail the new UCSS Openweight champion. --- Injury Report Oleg Makos: Mild Concussion (Two Month Medical Suspension) -A simple, fast KO thanks to the swinging right hand of Andronicus Turner will seat Makos on the suspended list for two months, where hopefully, he avoids Twitch chat rooms and dubious schemes... Aoife Daley: Torn Hamstring (Two Month Medical Suspension) -With a flying leglock by Eliza Faulkner, Aoife Daley ended up tapping fast. And thankfully so, as she suffered a partial hamstring tear as a result, and any extra resistance could have led to a much longer recovery period. As it is, Daley will be out for several months to heal and rehab her hamstring. FENYANG: Pulled Quadriceps (No Medical Suspension) -A dragon screw from Ibrahim Rahman seemed to inflict an injury on the Botswanan star, but FENYANG will miss no time, with a painful, but otherwise insignifcant pulled quad muscle. Jumbo Joseph Butt: Moderate Concussion (Three Month Medical Suspension) -Joseph Butt lost his UCSS Openweight title and was knocked out by the knees of Rory Banner. Jumbo will miss three months as a result of his knockout loss and will have ample time to plan and prepare for his revenge. --- "Big Banter" Rory Banner: I would have warned all of you common simpletons. I would have told you all that an aged Geordie slob would be no match for a refined physical specimen such as myself. You all would have known that it was inevitable for the cream to rise to the top, for true greatness to be recognized, for a champion to claim that which was his...but no, the powers that be foolishly decided to restrict my speaking rights and placed a muzzle on my prescient words, and as such, there was no warning. And as such, now that I am properly the UCSS Openweight champion, now that the Big Banter Brand is restored to its proper place, you will recognize exactly why this was always meant to be. If you did not know before, if you lacked the proper literacy to read the signs, now all is clear. --- Dangerous Nicholas Alger: Jenkins, you son of a gun. You made the old me show up. Against someone like that, I needed everything. Everything I had. Because Darryl Jenkins is a top notch opponent. Good enough to make me fight like a champ. So, Jenkins, I'm not letting you off the hook. You get to come back again. This time, you, Gang Wong, two others, mini tournament. We find the next contender. Because I don't want to let Banner hold that belt any longer than he has to. --- Mackenzie Bergeron: Yeah, that was the best win of my career. Now I'm going to go get me a drink and a smoke. Got to reward a hard day's work. --- Onika Santos: (Translated from Portuguese) <You see that, do you? That was the fruit of my studies! That was true Caporeia, adapted to pro wrestling! From Brazil to Angola to America! And I want to take the next step up, to UCSS or Pan Africa gold! Let me show you all the unbeatable, unbreakable rhythm!> --- The Warbringer: I am ready now! Have I not told you that I am not patient? Renate Barlowe: Patience is essential in a warrior. Warbringer: Hah, you keep saying that like you're going to convince me. But you know, Renate, maybe you got a point. Can't go for the Pan African belt right now, it will take longer for Mutombo to recover after he got put down by that Young Blood maniac. Barlowe: Don't even think of crossing his path. Warbringer: No, I have some other things in mind. First off, that Midas guy had that offer. I'm taking it, no questions asked. That match is going to kick ass. Barlowe: Agreed, you shouldn't pass up on that. Warbringer: Then you and me, we got those tag belts to win, and those champs look ripe for the picking. Barlowe: Not to me. They look like they just went through hell and came out intact. We don't underestimate them, not for a second. You take them lightly, and they make us pay for it. Warbringer: You know me, you think I am underestimating them? Barlowe: I think you think you can slam them through the mat at the same time. You're twice their size, much stronger, not much slower. But don't think your straight line speed can outdo their agility. Or their experience. Warbringer: We're going for it, aren't we? Barlowe: We certainly are. Warbringer: Don't worry, I'm not afraid of the Black Star Cyclones, but I'm also not going to treat them like they're anything less than the real champs and dangerous opponents. They're North Carolina...but I'm Duke. Barlowe: If you say so. --- Della Dwight: That feels really good. Finally made my decision, and while I know it took a long time, I think this feels like home, already. "Textbook" Tim Dwight: I think you made a good choice. Ness and I weren't looking to join your team in Wacker Drive, Santana Family wouldn't have worked out too well with the big feud going on there between the factions, the rest of the organizations didn't have much to directly offer you, I'm happy you picked UCSS. Della: Not going to be easy, I'm gonna have to establish myself now, Suzie was a good opponent, but I need to move up the ranks. So, next time around, lots of good choices, I'm ok with anyone they want to match me up with. I don't want to be hot shotted to the belt. That's not what I'm here for. I'm here to start my career outright now, and to take on as many strong challenges as I can find! So, DNA, I'm not the booker, you make me a match, and I'll do my best to exceed everyone's expectations! That's the Dwight way, and that's my way! And if you don't like that, you can hit the highway...and do some Outlaw Wrestling... Textbook: Um, Della, that was about 99% of a good promo. You were doing so well, but you just might want to tighten up the last part, alright? |
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Post by gambler on Jul 6, 2020 21:45:18 GMT
Darryl Jenkins
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Post by Senator Phillips on Jul 8, 2020 15:26:55 GMT
It's what everyone knew they needed, but didn't know they wanted, it's the return of the single most legendary recurring event in comedy history, it's the return of the man, the myth, the folk hero, the celebrated hall of famer, the undisputed greatest of all time, the legend, in his own preferred environment, it's the return of Stanford Bradley and the Funny Factory!  Note: The Senatorial Office expressly disapproves of this messageStanford Bradley: That's right, you shitfaced shitheads, I'm back. It's a new day in the Office, yes it is! Senator Asshole Phillips, gone forever, leaving this honest, clean business of professional wrestling to go back to his true love, politics. And speaking of Phillips's true love, did any of you guys see the Irish Firecracker get her leg torn off the other day? That Eliza girl just walked across the ring and ripped her leg away in like five seconds! Tap and snap, bitches! Funniest thing I've ever seen! But anyway, I've got a new job around these parts, before I get to that, however, let me just tell you a little story.
Stanford: You see, the other day, Ol' Uncle Stanford was doing his thing on the interwebs, chatting away on a comedy stream when he noticed something was very, very wrong. For months, Stanford Bradley had been using these emoji things in chat, and they were perfect in punctuating things, because, as you've all heard a thousand times, a picture's worth a thousand words, and Stanford just needs to use a picture of a cartoon donkey farting at you, or a turd flipping you the middle finger...since when did turds have middle fingers, anyway, but as I was saying, these were important tools for communication, you understand? And then one day, Stanford logs in, and went to give someone the message that only a custom image can convey, and lo and behold, the emojis were all gone! All gone! The loser who posted those shitty things took down my essential emojis and went home! I couldn't believe it! Sure, you're gonna say, I didn't pay for those, I didn't make them, but damn it, they were mine, I was used to using them, and that bastard took them away! I deserve recompense and retribution! Ok, ok, I'll calm down and get back to business...
Stanford: Anyway the Golden Man himself, Morgan Midas Matthews has commissioned me to announce the new Golden Touch for this Friday, and at the same time, since I'm now the official motherfuckin' spokesman for the Office Number One Ranked PEWA Extrrrrreme Champion, Young Blood, I get to do two jobs at once! So, without further delay, let me give you the official, that's right, THE official rundown of Friday's card!  Golden Touch #6: This Time It's RealFriday, July 10th, following All Time Boxing on our timeline at the Beltway Hippodrome Senatorial Office #1 Ranking Bout Young Blood(C) vs. Salvador SosaStanford: That's right, the baddest man on the planet, the guy they all feared so much that they made me speak for him, Young Blood is finally going to go out there and defend his Number One for real now against that chumpstain, Salvador Sosa! And let me tell you, from personally experiencing what he brings in the ring, Sosa's got nothing! I almost beat him! And while I'm pretty much the living reincarnation of Lou Thesz and Karl Gotch's lovechild, Young Blood's like, I dunno, Hades and Hercules mashed together with barbed wire and razor blades and Affliction shirts to become the most badass of badasses that ever badasseed ever, so Salvador Sosa better have his room all lined up at the local hospital of choice, 'cause that's where he's headed the moment his match, and his career are over! Family Festival: Santana vs. The Carne Family Team Santana(Felix Santana Senior, Felix Santana Junior, Felice Santana and Felix Santana III) vs. La Familia(Mega Meat, Besos, Rey de la Carne and Chico Con Carne)(Wrestle Parade)Stanford: So, wrestling families are a thing. The good thing, no Marshalls here, so we don't get to experience that sort of dubious relationship live and on stream! And even better, they say this has never happened before, never before has the Meat Family and the Santana Family gone four on four against each other! Now me, I gotta be pulling for the Meats, because, come on, if you can't love a team that has these big time personalities, you got problems! Mega Meat is who I aspire to be in two decades. Guy eats what he wants, does what he wants, he's just old school cool, like in a Mexican Burt Reynolds, but shorter and fatter sort of way. Rey de la Carne, ok, this guy creeps me out. His smile is too white. Too wide. Too omnipresent. Scary. Hey, I smile when I watch his matches. But in a sort of "I'm smiling too, just so you don't try to carve a Glasgow Smile on my face to make me smile" sort of way. Chico is a lucha guy. Lucha's alright. And then you have Besos, who MAKES PEOPLE TAP OUT WITH HER KISS. TAPS PEOPLE OUT WITH KISSES, ALL THE TIME. Alright, you gotta pull for that team. And because the Santanas are a bunch of stick in the mud jackasses, but, yeah. Hall vs. Yoshirozuna III: No Holds Barred The Outlaw, Sam Hall vs. Yoshirozuna(OG-FPD)Stanford: Yeah, Mr. Stuffed Suit himself, Anthony "Don't Call Me Tony" Kalb suspended Sam Hall, after he had a friggin' awesome match with Roland Chang Jr. and kicked ass all through the backstage into the gym into Tony Kalb's Office office. It was great. But then he had to be a corporate jerkwad and suspended Sam. Well, Midas said "I don't care" and booked him anyways! So here, we got OG-FPD's big ol' sumo man, Yoshirozuna. Guy's supposed to be some sort of legend or something. I've heard they went one and one. And now it's time for the rubber match. Seriously, though, don't you all snicker like 4th graders when you hear that term? Don't tell Stanford you aren't thinking what I'm thinking when you hear "Rubber Match." Didn't Vince Russo actually book that one time, a rubber on pole match...and that makes it even worse! Ok, ok, before I get myself kicked out from here, this ain't one of those. Just two big meaty men slapping meat...yeah, I'll stop while I'm behind. Clash of the Veterans Yuki Maeda(Phoenix Rising) vs. Yuriko Masamune)Stanford: I don't know why they booked two elderly women against each other, but because I'm here to promote this stuff, I'll do my best. Yuki Maeda's apparently been working people over and Yuriko Masamune's respected by Crusher Honda, so I guess that makes them both bad enough that this might not end up being some boring old people fight, you know, like the ones the TIPWF has an actual freakin' belt for! Hey, Texas, give Stanford a belt, too! Let's have a promo championship for cool people! Now there's an idea! Bring the War The Warbringer with Renate Barlowe vs. War Bringer, Demarcus Browning)Stanford: This one's a fight for the name Warbringer! Winner gets to be the guy known as the guy who brings war, and the other guy just goes by his regular boring name...except Moustapha Ndour and Demarcus Browning are actually pretty badass names, so I can't say the loser is all that much of a loser...and I guess they're also not fighting over the name, so I suppose they're just going to bring some war against each other here, so ok, I'll take the "L" here on this one. Featured Talent Pizza Bread(Kenny Bread(Port City Pro) and Masked Maniac IV)
Viper Lopez(Lucha POWER)
Killer King JonesStanford: A bunch of bums are gonna get bum slayed...but maybe not with Pizza Bread, those two are basically a pair of evolved bums, so they could actually lose to some bums, if we're being real here. Viper Lopez, who the hell is she? Guess she's a lucha lady from Lucha ALL CAPS POWER, past that, I can't tell you jack squat. Killer King Jones is a big fatass. 'Nuff said. And that's Golden Touch #6 in a nutshell, a shell we'll crack open this Friday after some boxing stuff goes down! The Office can't ever hope to book like Midas books, so you better make this appointment viewing, because it's the only show on the Senatorial Streaming Service that's really worth watching all the way through! And this is Stanford Bradley, the trusted name in news, comedy, wrestling and life in general, signing off. |
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Post by Senator Phillips on Jul 10, 2020 17:46:27 GMT
Double card tonight with All Time Boxing leading off on a card featuring the undefeated ATB Heavyweight champ, Joe Louis defending against German underdog, Axel Schulz, and Floyd Mayweather Jr. facing off against the Hands of Stone, Roberto Duran. Directly following the conclusion of All Time Boxing, Golden Touch Promotions goes on the air with an array of outstanding interpromotional matchups, culminating in a Senatorial Office #1 Ranking defense, as Young Blood finally faces off against Salvador Sosa. Catch it all starting at 8:00 PM (CT) on the Senatorial Streaming Service: www.twitch.tv/senatorphillips |
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Post by Senator Phillips on Jul 13, 2020 17:28:46 GMT
One of the best shows the Senatorial Streaming Service has seen in some time, with match after match topping the one before it on a night culminating in a main event that may have been a contender for the match of the year honors. RESULTS Golden Touch #6: This Time It's Real Friday, July 10th, following All Time Boxing on our timeline at the Beltway Hippodrome Bonus Match El Hijo de Macchiato vs. D-Man Daunte Thomas  Sticking around after the main event(and changing his mask), Macchiato took on the challenge of a refreshed, renewed D-Man, Daunte Thomas in a bonus bout. Both men were in fine form, and engaged in a match that in itself could have competed for a match of the night award on just about any other card...were it not for the head scratching finish, with Macchiato somehow pinning Thomas after a simple hip toss. Senatorial Office #1 Ranking Bout Young Blood(C) vs. Salvador Sosa with Killer King Jones, El Hijo de Macchiato and Canadian Grizzly  With the Rudo Army at ringside, Salvador Sosa was on a mission. Kicking out of an early Blood Drive small package bomb, Sosa pummeled his hated opponent with a startling arsenal of attacks, dropping him on his head, landing superkicks, swanton bombs, facebusters and the Road to Salvation vertebreaker. None were sufficient. Along the way, Young Blood opened a wound on Sosa's head with an illegal object, and while it seemed that the current top ranked Office star was finally on the verge of defeat, he would again demonstrate not just his iron will but his cold hearted maliciousness, landing the same move that put so many others on the shelf, Last Will and Testament wrist clutch fireman carry driver, on the unprotected floor, and concluded the match with a knockout as a result. Family Festival: Santana vs. The Carne Family Team Santana(Felix Santana Senior, Felix Santana Junior, Felice Santana and Felix Santana III) vs. La Familia(Mega Meat, Besos, Rey de la Carne and Chico Con Carne)(Wrestle Parade)  Pure lucha chaos. The only words that could truly describe this match. Both teams spent as much time in a frenzied maelstrom as they did in actual matchups in the ring, a crazed environment that somehow allowed Felice Santana to net one of the biggest wins of her career when she landed the Santana Sky step up swan dive moonsault press on Mega Meat. Hall vs. Yoshirozuna III: No Holds Barred The Outlaw, Sam Hall vs. Yoshirozuna(OG-FPD)  The trend for each match to top the last continued with the third bout between Yoshirozuna and Sam Hall delivering and then some. Both men showcased their toughness and disdain for the other in a match that only escalated as it went along, with Yoshirozuna kicking out of an unbelievable array of Hall's best moves. Even so, a combination of a leaping knee strike and the dreaded Outlaw Boot finally netted Hall a hard earned victory to go two and one against the legendary sumo warrior. Clash of the Veterans Yuki Maeda(Phoenix Rising) vs. Yuriko Masamune)  Seemingly inspired by the competitive energy of the previous match, Maeda and Masamune went back and forth in a match that was as intense as it was technical, showcasing the wide variety of skills that both celebrated veterans have refined through the years. In the end, it would be Yuriko Masamune who survived a late onslaught from Yuki Maeda, finishing with a Hercules Cutter argentine neckbreaker. Bring the War The Warbringer with Renate Barlowe vs. War Bringer, Demarcus Browning)  An awesome shootout slugfest with the two bringers of war trading their best moves back and forth until two Obliteration Machine pumphandle stretch side slams from Moustapha Ndour eventually won the match. Pizza Bread(Kenny Bread(Port City Pro) and Masked Maniac IV) vs. Robbie Roberts and Neil  Kenny Bread and Masked Maniac IV are almost never the favored team in the ring, and seemed to bask in the spotlight, taking thirty five minutes to defeat their ENHANCE opponents, with some surprisingly competitive moments before a Wheat Bread Music superkick finished Neil. Viper Lopez(Warrior Pro) vs. La Belleza  The opposite of the opener, with Viper Lopez taking care of business and putting the Instagram Luchadora away quickly with a high angle rana. Killer King Jones vs. String Bean  A match that went entirely too long as both men lost their stamina and Killer King Jones spent too much time messing around. Eventually, Jones would win with a simple headbutt. For a show packed with quality matches, this was an outright dud, no matter what the Digital One's rating was. --- Match of the Night: Young Blood vs Salvador Sosa. -While Maeda-Masamune, Hall-Yoshirozuna, Warbringer-Browning and the Santana-Familia matchs would all be worthy of this honor on most nights, the Office #1 Ranking bout was far and away the most intense, action packed battle of the show, and the clear winner. Performer of the Night: Young Blood -One hates to give the reprehensible champ a dual award, but he clearly earned it by his gutsy, violent victory in defense of his ranking. --- Injury Report Salvador Sosa: Dislocated Shoulder(Four Month Medical Suspension) -The good news is that Sosa did not receive yet another head injury. The bad news is that he suffered a badly dislocated shoulder at the hands of Young Blood's Last Will and Testament and will spend four months on the shelf as he recovers once again from injury. As the current Dominican Golden Champion, Sosa's injury will force some hard choices for Santana Family Wrestling in the near future. --- Stanford Bradley: As the handsome and intelligent spokesman for Young Blood, I have to relay the message that he doesn't care if Salvador Sosa dies. Ain't that some Ivan Drago shit? But seriously, the champ says all of you who don't like how he wins can go to hell. And he's also saying that he doesn't want to defend his Number One again until the Office finds someone worthwhile. So until then, he's only, and I repeat, ONLY going to wrestle outside the Office or the PEWA! That's all he told me, but you know that Stanford Bradley has a hellova lot more to say, so like I was saying, you heard the one about the dog that crossed the street... --- Felix Santana Senior: (Translated from Spanish)<First, let me thank La Familia for taking the time to have a match with my family. They're some of the best competitors and characters around and anywhere they go benefits from their presence. I'm very proud of Felice for winning that match for our side, and I hope we can do this again some day.> Felix Senior: <Now, second, I have to address the state of the Dominican Golden Championship. Salvador Sosa is missing four months of action. But as hard as he worked for that belt, I'm not taking it away. Instead, we'll make an interim belt, and make a little tournament for the next event. El Froggy Mask will take on the New Humanity, and I myself will take on Gorilla Power. Winner of this tournament will hold the interim belt until Sosa is back, at which, we'll unify the belts.> Felix Senior: <But that's not all. Let me make something clear. I wasn't much a fan of Salvador Sosa at first. He seemed too full of himself, wanted to change everything up, break up my family's traditions. But after Colossus Rhodes injured him, I got to know Salvador a bit more. And I can say now that I have a great deal of respect for the man, and am proud to have him as my organization's champion. It sets my blood on fire seeing what Young Blood did out there! And because of that, I'm going to throw this out there: I'll pay a hefty bounty to anyone who takes that stupid bastard down for good! And if Anthony Kalb's got a problem with that, he and the Board can tell me to my face! But I'll be damned if I let that ink faced cretin wreck anyone else's career!> --- Sam Hall: Zuna, you madman, I gotta say you're a worthy foe out there! Had to pull out everything there! Even the gutwrench suplex! That's two and one, now, you wide load sumo maniac! But now, damnit, I'm suspended in the Office and they ain't letting me fight again for a while! So, you want to make this a best of five...guess we gotta do that over in OG-FPD or wherever you fight these days! --- The Warbringer: Hey, Browning, you're even better than they told me! That match ruled! No offence, Renate, but I gotta ask this now. Browning! Next time, you and me, let's team up and see if we can't get the Pan African Tag belts! Renate Barlowe: If it makes us all money, I'll be happy to step aside and manage you two. Go for it. Warbringer: You hear that? Let's got get those belts! |
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Post by Senator Phillips on Jul 16, 2020 17:58:31 GMT
The SWA Heavyweight title is on the line, on a card also featuring another #1 contender match, singles matches between the Vanishing and the Thunder Devils, and much, much more!  SWA - Steel's Cage Championship 8:00 PM (CT) on Friday, July 17th at the Doors of Perception in Los Angeles, CA SWA Heavyweight Title Bout - Steel Cage Match Steel Johnson(C) vs. Karts RowdyA match set up with Johnson's win over Blanchard Fleming for the title, and Rowdy's win over Bobby Bobby in a contender's match. Normally close allies, these two will not be likely to hold back. Johnson, having earned an unlikely late career title victory, will be looking to solidify his reign and make the best of what could well be his last time on top, while Rowdy seeks out his first taste of the SWA Heavyweight title, and having managed to earn his title shot in his signature match, will likely never have a better chance to follow through. SWA Heavyweight Title #1 Contender Bout John "Newface" Smith vs. Max BertrandThe Newface has done nothing but impress in the last few months, earning win after win, and as a result, the relative novice will have a chance to fight for the highest prize in the SWA. Before he does so, however, he must defeat one of the top veterans in the fed in a returning Max Bertrand, who hasn't been seen in SWA action since suffering an injury in the All American Athletes' title loss to The Vanishing. Bertrand's vicious suplexes will serve as a rough test for John Smith, and one has to consider him a clear favorite. Renacimiento(Oliver Espadas and Leonardo Pascual) vs. Mask Legend and Blood AngelAfter injuries separated the duo for a few months, Renacimiento is back in full force, against a dynamic duo of Mask Legend and Blood Angel, a pairing that was originally forged in one of Roy Bennett's trips to Japan. This will be Mask Legend's first time appearing on a joint SWA-Office broadcast, and the longtime New Century Pro Wrestling stalwart will be eager to hold up his own end against the Mexican upstarts. Notorious vs. Dag BoomerThe second of two matches pitting the Vanishing against the Thunder Devils with the heavy hitting Dag Boomer going up against the equally hard hitting Notorious. Boomer's crushing power attack and Notorious's relentless explosiveness could well make for a MOTN contender if both show up motivated and ready. Blade Saeba vs. "Ringside Thunder" Laurence HollandThe World Warrior, Saeba and Ringside Thunder are two dynamic, multi-skilled competitors, comfortable in a variety of settings, and will meet in this singles battle between members of the Vanishing and the Thunder Devils. As the Devils look to take a future shot at the tag champs, Holland will likely attempt to establish his potent kicks while Saeba's broad skillset will allow him to compete with whatever his opponent throws at him. The Goodfellas(Eddie the Wire and Tony the Rod)(Wacker Drive Revival) and Mr. Cobra with Lucretia DeCavalcante(Wacker Drive Revival) vs. Avant Garde(Nature Strange, Baron Charles and "Mr. Women" Jamie Wilson)The new holders of The Loop championship in Wacker Drive now travel to the West Coast to assist Mr. Cobra on his own home turf. The Syndicate team will be sorely tested against the bizarre, but effective team of Avant Garde, Nature Strange's alliance of oddball misits. SWA Prestige Rules "Death Prince" Ernest Miller vs. Frog BusterErnest Miller has promised a first round KO against the massive beast known as Frog Buster. While Buster's chin has been checked in the past, and while the Death Prince has certainly proven his power many times, from BLADE MMA to the SWA, such a proclamation may well backfire on the confident striker. |
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Post by Senator Phillips on Jul 21, 2020 17:00:27 GMT
RESULTS --- SWA - Steel's Cage Championship 8:00 PM (CT) on Friday, July 17th at the Doors of Perception in Los Angeles, CA Bonus Match Allen Hawkins vs. Red Dragon  An outstanding match between two determined wrestlers, with Allen Hawkins making a rare singles appearance, and making the best of his trademark Canadian style. Hawkins controlled large portions of the match with his skillful approach, coming close to locking in his Sharpshooter at multiple points. On the other side, Red Dragon answered with fewer, but bigger blows, using his superior power to stay in the contest, long enough to give himself an opening to land the Yalpagan's Conquest, his diving frog splash to take a well earned win. SWA Heavyweight Title Bout - Steel Cage Match Steel Johnson(C) vs. Karts Rowdy  Karts Rowdy is always in his element within the confines of a steel cage, and demonstrated just why as he took the best of his opportunity, nullifying the bulk of the champ's offence, hitting his Vulture Dive 450 Splash and eventually caught Steel Johnson with a counter rollup to win the SWA Heavyweight title! As the cage went up, Max Bertrand walked out to confront the new champion, with the details of the encounter posted below. SWA Heavyweight Title #1 Contender Bout John "Newface" Smith vs. Max Bertrand  The Newface and Max Bertrand both wore amateur headgear for an anticipated grappling centered approach, but, as valiantly as John Smith fought, it was clear that he was entirely outgunned by his All American opponent, with Bertrand suplexing him around the ring, answering the Newface Powerbomb with a bigger one of his own and eventually pinning him with a German Suplex bridge. Max Bertrand is now the #1 contender for the SWA Heavyweight title. Renacimiento(Oliver Espadas and Leonardo Pascual) vs. Mask Legend and Blood Angel  Mask Legend and Blood Angel looked like a legitimate team from the opening bell, coordinating well and handling their one on one matchups. With the support of the fans and momentum on their side,, it seemed as if the newly forged team was on its path to a win, but the returning Renacimiento drew upon their tactical knowledge and their blazing speed, as Oliver Espadas rolled the Angel up at a fortunate opportunity to grasp the win away from their foes. Notorious vs. Dag Boomer  This one took a bit longer than its preceeding match to build up, but when it did, both Boomer and Notorious threw the big bombs they're known for, including the Big Dag Crush reverse splash from Boomer. It would instead be a big dive from Notorious, a top rope knee drop that would finish the match, finishing the Vanishing-Thunder Devils series at 1-1. Blade Saeba vs. "Ringside Thunder" Laurence Holland  An outstanding showing from both men in this match, as Saeba and Holland showcased their wide skillsets. Saeba even seemed to dip into the dark arts of the hardcore at one point, raking the eyes, using a chair, hitting a piledriver on the outside and using poison mist, but it would be Holland who was able to raise his arm at the end, landing a buzzsaw kick followed by a crushing knee strike to earn the pinfall. The Goodfellas(Eddie the Wire and Tony the Rod)(Wacker Drive Revival) and Mr. Cobra with Lucretia DeCavalcante(Wacker Drive Revival) vs. Avant Garde(Nature Strange, Baron Charles and "Mr. Women" Jamie Wilson)  Less of a match and more of a chaotic melee, both sides got in some good shots, with Baron Charles humiliating Eddie the Wire at one point with a HENTAI driver and his Power of Love followup, and it was only the timely interference of Lucretia DeCavalcante at ringside that prevented a shocking defeat. The Wire would eventually get his revenge, proving that messing with a Made Man is a bad idea when he laid Charles out with a Wire Cutter to end the match. SWA Prestige Rules "Death Prince" Ernest Miller vs. Frog Buster  Ernest Miller was wrong, dead wrong, at that. Not only did Frog Buster make it out of the first round, but utilizing his bulk and massive power, Buster rag dolled the accomplished striker and demolished him with a spinning gutwrench slam to earn the second round KO. --- Match of the Night: Red Dragon vs. Allen Hawkins -Almost certainly this one was far and away the best of the evening, although the Saeba-Holland and the Renacimiento-Angel/Legend matches were better than average as well. Dragon and Hawkins fought back and forth in an exciting, skillful bout to more than justify their bonus match showing. Performer of the Night: Karts Rowdy -Not only did Karl Gowdy win the title, but he made it look effortless against the man who beat Blan Fleming for the belt. --- Injury Report Ernest Miller: Lumbar Back Strain (One Month Medical Suspension) -A spinning gutwrench slam from Frog Buster put the Death Prince down for the count, and severely tweaked his back. Fortunately, the renowned knockout artist will likely be back in time for the next SWA super broadcast. Baron Charles: Paralyzing Fear (No Medical Suspension) -It appears that after being checked by the medical staff that Charles simply stayed down on the mat following Eddie the Wire's famed Wire Cutter, following some intimidating threats from Lucretia DeCavalcante at ringside. While there will be no medical suspension, SWA staff are reportedly looking into the situation. --- After the cage started rising up following the SWA title win of Karts Rowdy, the new #1 Contender, Max Bertrand appeared at ringside, microphone in hand. Max Bertrand: Don't get comfortable! That belt's mine, next! Karts Rowdy: Hey there, hot shot, you better keep to your lane! I just won this belt, you'll get your chance, don't worry about that, because if anything's true about me, it's that I'm not afraid of any challenge! Not on a track, not in a ring, not in a cage! Bertrand: You just beat the old man there, you aren't ready for an All American Athlete! Karts: This old man here beat your buddy...who's also an "All American Athlete!" So if I'm doing the math, if the Sarge beat Blanchard, then I beat Sarge, and everyone knows that Blan's better than you, then I should run you off without losing a drop of sweat! In fact, you know, let's hold off on this title match for another month! Next time, you get Blanchard, and you two will see just how much better that Sgt. Steel and I are! We don't like either of you! You got crushed by those Vanishing bums who couldn't even beat both of the Thunder Devils and we're way better than Boomer and Holland! We're both better than you two, and we aim to prove it! Steel Johnson: I didn't ask for this...but fine. Next time, Karts and I take on the All American Athletes. Karts: That's right, we're going to beat you two inside a steel cage! Steel: No cage. Karts: Come on, Sarge, let's run this! Steel: Nope. No cage, and that's final. Karts: Crap. Bertrand: I'm just tired of listening to you run your big mouth. Show up next time, and the Athletes will shut it for you! Then I'm gunning for that belt and nothing's stopping me from taking it! --- A backstage meeting between Syndicate leader Lucretia DeCavalcante and SWA official Grateful Saeba was caught on camera: Lucretia DeCavalcante: All I said was that we don't put up with that sort of disrespect. Grateful Saeba: Is that all...really? Lucretia: I may have said that such actions may lead to retribution. But that was stating the facts, not making a threat. Grateful: Yeah, sure. Lucretia: And I also may have mentioned that people who cross the Syndicate do not live with impunity. Again, not a threat, and you can just ask Blue Destiny to verify that fact. Grateful: Uh, ok. That's all? Lucretia: No, but that's all that's relevant. Grateful: Well, as I see it, Baron Charles may have overreacted. And that's what I'm telling the higher ups. He panicked. He did something stupid. And that's it. Lucretia: That is acceptable. Grateful: But don't be surprised if they don't agree with me. I've...had my share of incidents in the past. Had some fans run into my fist in Shanghai. A misunderstanding, but not everyone gets it. So I'll make sure you don't get...unfairly punished for this one. But I can't guarantee anything going forward, so don't go putting hits on anyone or anything shady like that. Lucretia: I assure you that the Syndicate is entirely legitimate in its operations. Nothing shady or illicit in our dealings. Grateful: Good to hear. |
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